Every time I Think I'm Out...

Oh People, every time I thing I'm out of the game, you keep dragging me back in! I've tried to retire, to step back and let the world turn, but seriously people, you're all nuts! First, please stop whining about your Starbucks cup! Starbucks doesn't "hate Jesus". Starbucks loves money. If they thought putting a Nativity Scene on their cups would sell more coffee there'd be a manger on every cup. If you can't enjoy your overpriced latte with a Douglas Fir on the cup, draw one on yourself! Seriously, get your freakin' priorities in order and simmer down.
The President of the University of Missouri system has resigned amid criticism over his handling of student complaints about racism and discrimination. Actually, he resigned because the football team refused to play and that would have cost the University about a million bucks. Chancellor L. Bowen Loftin will also be leaving. Problem solved, right? LOL!
A college group recently advertised their upcoming "Hawaiian Night" party. They say it was to "bring a little warmth to their cold climate". What it brought was a firestorm of controversy. Why? Because it's culturally insensitive, that's why. You see, in today's realm of higher education "Appropriating another culture for an event, costume or poster is disrespectful" and, therefore discriminatory. Even the wearing of a Hawaiian shirt, if one is not Polynesian, is now considered "casual racism".  "Cultural Appropriation" is, by definition, "The use of oversimplified, packaged versions of the culture of oppressed groups". I've been to Hawaii. They didn't seem oppressed to me but, hey, what do I know. I am curious as to why they sell Hawaiian shirts to tourists in Hawaii if they're so upset when we wear them. A conundrum, wouldn't you say? It's not limited to Polynesians. According to the list I saw, provided by the University of Washington, "oppressed groups" seems to cover just about everyone. Wearing, ponchos, sombreros and fake mustaches insults Mexicans. I get the sombreros but I wasn't aware that mustaches were culturally Mexican. The directive went on to say that men who dress in drag are offensive "unless they mean it". Yup. I'm not even going to touch that one. We should probably cancel St. Patrick's Day right now! Oh, that's right, the Irish are too drunk to be offended on St. Patrick's Day. See what I did there? Watch me bring it all home now. The groups that are now calling for a strict adherence to "cultural appropriation" are the same groups that insist that religion be taken out of Christmas. Apparently Christians have never been oppressed so appropriating one of their most sacred holidays is fair game. Funny how that works. So, let me end where I began. Simmer down people, simmer down.
Po