It's Finally Happened!

Hello People. I never thought I would see the day, but here it is, in all it's glory! The New York Times, via an opinion piece, has deemed SALAD....wait for it.....RACIST! That's right. Times columnist Bonnie Tsui has taken up the long awaited battle against racist Asian Salad. Why? Because it's made by "Westerners", not Asians, thus, it's cultural appropriation, vis-a-vis Racist! Tsui rants, or in this case writes, that "racist Westerners often use offensive stereotypes to name such Americanized cuisine while fetishizing Asian culture". Huh? Tsui goes on to say that "The casual racism of the Asian salad stems from the idea of the exotic" and is "rooted in the wide-ranging 'all look the same' stereotype of Asian culture". Wow. Really? You got all of that out of an Applebees salad? Wait until she finds out that French Fries aren't really French or that Buffalo Wings come from chickens! I shouldn't be surprised. In the last year or so the "OK" sign, chopsticks, The Constitution, the words 'thug', 'urban', 'inner city', and, my personal favorite, 'American' have all been deemed racist. Earlier this week, on the campus of Colgate College, a call came in to the security office from a student who said that a black man carrying what appeared to be a gun had entered a building on campus. The head of security sprang into action. He sent out an alert for students to shelter in place, contacted the police and implemented to 'active shooter' protocol in place. It turns out the man was a student and the weapon was a glue gun. When the facts came out, it was obvious that the security chief reacted to the report of a black man, not the whole gun thing, when he acted. So, he was, of course, suspended. Had the report been of a white man with what looked like a gun, I'm sure he would have just continued doing his crossword puzzle and called it a day. Thank goodness Colgate weeded out that bad seed! Oh, wait, before I forget, Friday is May 5th. Be careful what you call it. If you're even thinking about a celebration, think again. Don't be a racist! It's not your day, or your culture, to celebrate. Just say no to Cinco de Mayo!, Which, by the way, isn't even a national holiday in Mexico. Also, in case you missed it, Hawaiian Luaus are also a no-no. So, just to be safe people, stick with BBQ, Wings and Kraft cheese slices. And, if you want a day to celebrate that shouldn't offend anyone, try Tuesday the 22nd. The next one is in August. It's always been a favorite of mine.
Sway