Thoughts Over Catnip

Hello People! The First Lady is at it again. Her latest target...Smores! According to her MyPlate website, FLOTUS wants us to leave the chocolate and marshmallows out of Smores. Don't panic. Mrs. Obama isn't asking you to sit around the campfire eating plain graham crackers. That would be silly. No, FLOTUS wants us to replace the chocolate and marshmallow with strawberries and low fat yogurt! YUM! I can just see it now. The kids all sitting around the fire with a strawberry on a stick, giddily waiting for it to heat up so they can slap it on a blob of low fat yogurt. Mouthwatering, isn't it? We'll have to change the name though. Smores, or S'Mores as they're technically called, implies that you would want more than one. This new version is more like Yuk on a Cracker so we'll call it the Yacker. The war on deliciousness continues!
Speaking of deliciousness, it looks like the fine people of Mississippi can't resist it! For the second year running, Mississippi has been named the State with the highest obesity rate at 35.2%.  I guess they're not eating all of those soybeans they're growing. New York State, by the way, was among the lowest in the Nation with an obesity rate of 24.7%. I assume that's because people in this State can't afford to over eat! Anyway, I can't help but wonder where they're hiding the scales. How else would they know how much everyone weighs?
So, the always entertaining (for all the wrong reasons), Reverend Al Sharpton took to Twitter Wednesday to pose this question, (I'm quoting directly here) "Do you think the Texas flooding is related to climate control or God's Rebuke"? He tagged that moment of brilliance with #KeepingItReal. Oh Al, where to begin. First of all, it's climate change, not climate control. Next, what, in your divine understanding, did the fine people of Texas do that would prompt God to go all Old Testament on them? The real question here, Dear Reverend, is "Are you an example of our failed education system or just a personification of idiocy"? I'm leaning toward the latter.
Finally, in his younger days, Democratic Presidential Candidate Bernie Sanders wrote an essay saying that "women fantasize about being gang-raped". When questioned, his campaign said it was a failed attempt at satire. The "media" accepted that explanation and moved on. Nothing to see here. I can't help but wonder if the reaction would have been the same if the name on the bottom of that sick piece of crap was Ted Cruz or Chris Christie. I'm guessing it wouldn't be.
Sway