What I Want for Christmas

Hello my dear friends. It has been awhile. As you know, the captor broke her paw, so it has been a little difficult for me to get her to open up the laptop. But, I'm here now to start my new series "Things I Want for Christmas".
Dear Santa,
The first thing I need is actual news. Could you please help me with this. I can no longer suffer through this barrage of opinion and idiocy that now passes for news. I'm starving for one simple, untainted source of accurate, unbiased information. I don't want to "go to our website" for details on a story. I don't want to hear what "GrannyFromGeddes" posted on your facebook page. I don't care what's "Trending on Twitter". I want facts. 20 thousand people commenting on an event does not make that event news worthy. Yes, I understand that it's all about the ratings. I have "news" for you. Inserting pictures of a viewers cat into your "newscast" does not increase ratings. It lowers IQs. If you want to increase your ratings, try offering some content worth watching. Also, including at least one anchor/reporter who actually understands what they're reporting would be helpful. The other day, as I suffered through 30 minutes of "local news" the "Big" story was about the kids from the TV show Two and a Half Men making a YouTube video telling people not to watch the show. First of all, that's not news, it's entertainment at best, but it became the lead story. The trouble is the anchor kept referring to the actor as "Agnes T. Jones" instead of "Angus T. Jones". You would think that after the first THREE times he did it, someone would have corrected him, but no. That same anchor does his entire newscast from an iPad and continually refers to it, "Checking the iPad now", "According to the iPad". I understand how trade deals work but seriously, buy a damn iPad and spare us the constant product placement. It's supposed to be a newscast not a 30 minute infomercial. In the past year I've heard "Reporters" say things like "according to facebook" or "according to their website". Are you kidding me? When a reporters first thought is check the internet all hope is lost. Maybe you're not aware of this but sometimes things on the internet are not true. Seriously. Sometimes people just make stuff up. It happens! So Santa, if at all possible, could you bring me, bring us all, a little actual news. It really could make this world a better place. Thank you
PoKitty