Thoughts Over Catnip

Hello My Dear Friends. It's been a tough week here at the prison but it's Friday, so it is time for my weekly thoughts over catnip. Why do potatoes lose their vegetable status when you turn them into french fries or chips? I don't know of any other vegetable that becomes a non-vegetable through the cooking process. I think potatoes are getting screwed. Along that same line, what's the deal with cured ham? What did it have to begin with? Is non-cured ham ill? I don't get it. Did you hear about the rodeo clown who wore an Obama mask at the Missouri State Fair? He was fired and banned for life from the fair. There are calls to deny state funding for the fair in the future and the NAACP wants a federal investigation into the clown who wore the mask! LOL! The Obama Halloween mask has been the #1 seller for years. I'll bet this news has a bunch of people shaking in their boots. Who knew that wearing a mask of the President could be a federal crime? One person at the fair compared a clown wearing an Obama mask to a Klan Rally. Really? At least now we know. Wear a mask of this President and you'll never work again! An 18 year old New Hampshire girl, paralyzed from the waist down and confined to a wheelchair, has been banned from this year's Paralympics in Montreal because an IPC doctor ruled she wasn't handicapped enough. The doctor suggested that, with years of intensive therapy, she might be able to walk again so she doesn't qualify. The fact that she's been in a wheelchair since age 11 and that she competed in Paralympic Games in London in 2012 are irrelevant. She won 4 medals in those games. Interesting. The people of Egypt declared today "A Day of Rage". I'm not sure what separates today from every other day. They're generally pretty angry over there. I wonder if Hallmark has a card for that. "Today we gather, rocks in hand, a riot we will wage; So grab the kids and hand grenades and join our Day of Rage"! You're welcome Hallmark. The captor got a new "Smart Phone" but all I've seen for the last two days is her tapping on the darn thing and saying "stupid phone". Which is it? Finally, NY State Comptroller Thomas DiNapoli has announced that our state will begin producing new drivers licenses by the end of this year. He says, even though they will cost taxpayers millions of dollars more each year, they new licenses will be "harder to alter or make into fake ID". Brilliant! Let's just hope those who would seek out false identification don't think to use a license from any of the other 49 states! Only in New York! Enjoy the weekend!
Po