Here Come the Olympics. USA! USA!

Hello my dear friends. Tomorrow we will experience the Opening Ceremonies of the Games of the XXX Olympiad! (That's 30th for those of you who are no longer taught Roman numerals). For the next 17 days Americans across the nation band together and pretend we know or care about things like wrestling, fencing and synchronised swimming. Other notable "sports" competitions will include Table Tennis (Ping Pong), Badminton and Trampoline.  These, of course, are not sports. They are what people, who are not coordinated enough to compete in real sports, play. That, I suppose, is why the call them the Olympic Games. Let's face it, for most Americans the Summer Games consist of Basketball, Track & Field and Gymnastics. Yes, Michael Phelps did increase our interest in swimming. Did you know that 950 athletes will be competing in 34 different swimming events? Do you care? My point, exactly. My biggest beef with the Olympics is, because they are being held overseas, the events will be long over before we see them and, because of the internet, we will already know the outcome before it airs. Makes for some pretty boring television if you ask me. Yes, we will see the thrill of victory and the agony of defeat. We will also see the Djibouti Table Tennis Team and the Burkina Faso Swim Team. Riveting. Other questionable "sports" include  Canoeing, Equestrian and the "Modern Pentathlon" which includes, running, swimming, shooting and fencing. Making the winner an all around nerd. We will also stare, transfixed, at the yawn inducing Football (Soccer), Water Polo, and Beach Volleyball. Followed by, but not out shined by, Cycling, Rowing and Sailing. Wow! It's going to be an adrenaline pumping couple of weeks! I can't wait for the excited banter over the much anticipated duel between Korea and Mexico for the Taekwondo Gold! Just the thought of it leaves me all atingle! USA! USA! USA!
Po