Parenting 101

Hello my dear friends. We all know that parenting is a very difficult job. They used to say that "babies don't come with instruction manuals". But, now apparently they do! Everyone has an opinion on the best way to raise a child and Women's Day Magazine has come up with the top 10 things you should never say to your child. It's a helpful and insightful guide to raising (in my humble opinion) a brat. Let's examine...
#1 "I know you can try harder".  According to WD this seems that you're not satisfied with your child's effort and can be discouraging to the child. Umm, yes, but if your not satisfied with your child's effort what should you say? So you failed, oh well.
#2  "Are you sure you need that second cupcake"?  WD says that kind of talk fosters a negative body image. Okay. How's this for an alternative. NO!
#3  "You always..." or "You never...". WD says these statements are labels and can stick for life. I'll give them that one.
#4  "Because I said so".  WD says this statement puts all of the control in your hands and dismisses the child's growing sense of autonomy. My mother must have been the worst parent in the world. Putting all of the control in the parents hands. Outrageous! Apparently it's much better to let the child make the call.
#5 "I told you so". WD says this tells the child that you're always right and, by contrast, they're always wrong. Well, if it walks like a duck...
#6  "You're the best at...". This makes the child afraid to try new things for fear of failure. Really? So apparently you should say "You got straight A's again! You are so average"!
#7  "Don't worry".  WD says this dismisses your child's feelings. Good call. It would be much better to validate your child's concern's by saying "you're right, no one is going to like you".
#8  "I wish you wouldn't hang around with that kid". WD says this makes the child want to see that person even more. I agree. So how about saying "You're not allowed to hang around with that kid and, if you do, you're grounded". That's what my mom did. Seemed to work pretty well.
#9  "That's not how you do it. Here, let me".  WD says this prevents the child from learning. Again, I agree. 'Let me show you how' is a much better choice because, not only does the child learn but you don't have to do the chore yourself.
#10 "Why can't you be more like your brother/sister". This creates resentment according to WD. It may but it also creates positive role models.
So, to recap, if you want to raise a confident, happy child, you should NEVER encourage them to work harder, let them eat whatever they want, never criticize or praise them, never take control, never soothe their fears, pick their friends, do their chores or compare them to their siblings. Is it just me? This doesn't sound like a good plan but, what do I know, I'm just a cat and Women's Day is, well, it's a magazine.
Po