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Tuesday, April 10, 2012

And We're Shocked By This, Right?

Hello my dear friends. I swear, sometimes you humans give me a headache. Will you never learn? Welcome to my new feature "And we're shocked by this"? Here we go...
*The 41 year old California teacher who quit his job and left his family so he could be with the love of his life, an 18 year old student, has done this before! James Hooker has been arrested on sexual assault charges. Not for his current relationship with 18 year old Jordan Powers (which just ended) but for his former relationship with a 17 year old student in 1998. Powers left Hooker when he was arrested saying she "just couldn't trust him anymore".  I'm Shocked! This pedophile has a history! Never saw that coming.
*Florida Marlins coach Ozzie Guillen told reporters that he "love Fidel Castro and respects him for being in power for so long". Once he sobered up, he retracted the statement and apologized. How do I know he was drunk when he said it? Because, in the same interview he also said he "gets drunk at the hotel bar after every game and has been doing so for 25, 28 years. It never changes". The team suspended him for 5 games effective immediately. Regardless, people want him fired! This is America! If you say or do something controversial you should never work again. Color me shocked!
*Mirlande Wilson, the wingnut McDonalds worker in Maryland who claimed to have won the giant Mega Millions jackpot WAS LYING! I am utterly Shocked! Her lawyer declined to comment. Shocked again! I have a feeling we haven't heard the last of Mirlande. Wouldn't that be Shocking!
*Anger is growing over the now infamous 2010 GSA (General Services Administration) convention in Las Vegas that cost taxpayers over $800,000 and featured videos, made by employees (on the clock) joking about wasting money and having taxpayers foot the bill. The Obama Administration, when confronted with this blatant waste of taxpayer dollars responded "This was something facilitated by the Bush Administration". This would be hysterical if it weren't so ridiculous. Yet another Obama Admin gaffe blamed on George Bush. I'm Shocked!
Po

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