Who doesn't love the TSA

Hello my dear friends. Great news! Apparently the TSA (Transportation Security Administration) has determined that strip searching 5 year olds and making grandma drop her depends may not be making our airports safer after all! Wow! What a revelation! They've determined that treating every passenger as a suspected terrorist may actually be causing unnecessary delays. Genius! So, after much deliberation, study and reflection they have come up with the "Pre-Check", a new program that allows pre-screened fliers to go through a dedicated or "easy pass" lane where they wouldn't have to removed their shoes, belts, jackets, etc. They can leave their 3-1-1 liquids, laptops, etc. in their carry on bags and basically breeze through the check point. Sounds great, right? LOL. It's a government program! So, all you have to do to join the "I'm not a terrorist" club is fill out an application and submit it with a $100 dollar (non-refundable) payment.  After your check clears you will be notified as to whether or not you qualify for the program. If you don't, well, sucks to be you. If you do, you'll submit to a series of security questions, a background check, finger prints and the like. If you pass that, you'll be given a date for a face to face interview a customs agent. If you clear all of these steps you will be deemed "not a terrorist" for the next 5 years! I'm beside myself with joy! Of course, for the rest of us, who don't fly often enough to fork over $100 to keep our shoes on, well, we'll just have to live with the stigma that we may still be considered a threat at airports, and be treated accordingly. On the upside, if enough people opt for the fast track it may make the slow track quicker for the rest of us! You have to love the TSA!
Po