I'd Laugh if it Weren't So Sad!

Hello my dear friends. Just when I thought you people couldn't get any more out of control you exceed my expectations! The New York City Department of Education has come out with a list of words they want removed from all standardized testing. The words and phrases in question could be "upsetting" to some students. Now, you're probably thinking this list consists of politically incorrect terms or slang. You would be wrong. The list includes words like "dinosaur" and "birthday". What? That's right. You see "dinosaur" suggests evolution and could be upsetting to creationists. "Birthday" is so happy when you're a Jehovah's Witness and don't celebrate birthdays. How about "hurricane" or any natural disaster? Yup, banned! "Animal shelter"? Nope, can't use it. It may be too traumatic. Also on the list, "celebrity" (might make kids jealous); "poverty" (bad for the self esteem). "Hunting". "divorce" and "homelessness" also made the list! The NYC DOE also wants to nix any mention of or reference to...

Homes with swimming pools; Expensive gifts or vacations; Sports that require prior knowledge; Computers in the home (it's okay to mention computers in school); death and disease, junk food and rock and roll music! There's more! My friends, this is only a partial list! The people who came up with this concept, let alone this list, need to be drug tested immediately. I would call them Goobers but that would be an insult to Goobers everywhere. I would call this Political Correctness Gone Wild, but it's so far beyond even that! It's insanity disguised as leadership. It's uber inclusion to the point of isolation. Either or; all or nothing; everyone or no one. What is wrong with people! Just because I observe Christmas and you observe Yom Kippur now means neither one of us can discuss either? I'm getting myself all upset again! Here's the complete list:

Banned Word List

This is why I am here people. This is why I do what I do. Because I firmly believe that humans are no longer capable of running this world! Look at the MESS you're making of things! It's like a cancer, oops, sorry, that's on the list. It's an abuse (nope, list). It's a crime the (list). It's like the bottom of the 9th (sorry, sports analogy). It's like they're running away with (damn, list). It's an attack (nope) assault (banned) war on (sorry) Let me put it this way, if life were a video game Are you Serious? Television? RATS! rats are vermin, vermin is banned) What? I can't take it anymore! What's left to say? How about Censorship? Is that banned? Well, not yet anyway.

Po  (sorry, could be slang for poor and that's banned)

Princess (implies wealth, banned) Otahdodah Kitty